Infertility

Infertility

Monday, November 16, 2015

Letting go of the Worries

It's Monday also known as 8 weeks 4 days!  I survived the weekend which included a bachelorette party for my future sister in law.  Fake drinking is HARD girls.  I'm pretty sure a few of the girls were suspicious but it is what it is.  I managed to stay out with the group until 11:30pm but then I gave in and went back to the hotel.  Yesterday I slept from 11:30-3:30 in the afternoon and still fell asleep on the couch before 9pm.  So.  Tired.  I'm still have really sore boobs, and just a general feeling of ickiness most days.  But no throwing up yet which is good I guess.  I'd gladly puke my guts out every day if it gave me some reassurance but honestly I don't think anything is capable of that.

As I mentioned in my last post I am not scheduled to go back to the doctor until the Wed. before Thanksgiving.  I decided this morning that just wasn't going to work.  I just couldn't wait that long without knowing if the babies were okay.  So I called my OB today and they scheduled me for a sono tomorrow morning.  I feel a little bit crazy but honestly I don't even care.  I'm hoping and praying so hard that everything is still good and it will offer me a little bit of reassurance.  I can't even think about the alternative.

Realistically I know that at some point I am going to have to go longer than 7 days but I just decided that doesn't need to be in the first trimester.  My hope is after we get through 12 weeks I'll feel a little bit better and will be able to make it the 2 weeks between appointments.  There's really no reason for me to be anxious.  I haven't had any bleeding, my symptoms haven't gone away.  I have been having what I'd call a pulling or stretching sensation along with some pressure in my uterus.  It's not painful so I wouldn't call it cramps but it has been pretty consistent the last two days.  The hope is it's just things stretching and growing in there but with everything that's happened I just can't rest easy.  A part of me wonders that even if everything is okay if I'll ever be able to relax.

1 comment:

  1. I don't blame you a bit. I had ultrasounds every week until 12 weeks and then every 2 weeks after that. And I wasn't even having twins! Sometimes you go through just about enough and you need a bit of reassurance to truly believe. Hoping today's scan puts your mind at ease a bit longer! xoxo

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